Speaking to anchor Robin Roberts on Good Morning America, the former first lady, Michelle Obama, opened up about what was one of the hardest times in her life – suffering a miscarriage twenty years ago.
She revealed in the new primetime ABC News special, Becoming Michelle: A First Lady’s Journey, that she “felt lost and alone and I felt like I failed”. She said that she was feeling the pressure of her “biological clock” ticking as she and her husband, former President Barack Obama, were trying to start a family and couldn’t. So, they had to rely on IVF to conceive the couple’s two daughters, Malia, 20, and Sasha, 17.
Mrs. Obama added that it’s important for women to share stories with each other because if she had known other women had gone through miscarriages as well, it would have helped her not feel as shameful about it. Which is why she says she is sharing her story.
“I felt like I failed because I didn’t know how common miscarriages were because we don’t talk about them,” she says in the interview. “We sit in our own pain, thinking that somehow we’re broken.” She adds that it’s crucial to be open to young mothers about miscarriages and that the biological clock ” is real because egg production is limited.”
“I think it’s the worst thing we do to each other as women,” Mrs. Obama explains. “Not share the truth about our bodies and how they work and how they don’t work.”
These are all topics that the former first lady elaborates further on her upcoming memorial, Becoming to be released on November 13.
Her memorial traces Mrs. Obama’s life from her childhood on Chicago’s South Side and all the way to her years as a First Lady as she lived in the White House.
She also writes about her relationship with Barack Obama, and how it began when the two were working at the same Chicago law firm and she was assigned as his adviser. That made her reluctant to begin a relationship, despite the immediate attraction, but it all changed after a kiss that summer.
“As soon as I allowed myself to feel anything for Barack, the feelings came rushing,” she writes in the memoir, according to ABC News. “A toppling blast of lust, gratitude, fulfillment, wonder.”
But, she adds, despite the seemingly perfect relationship she and Mr. Obama have, they did have to work hard in making it so. In fact, they even had to get couple’s counseling at one time. She tells Roberts that learning how to talk about their differences taught her that she was the one controlling her happiness, something that she refers to as “my pivot point” and “my moment of self-arrest” in her book.
“I know too many young couples who struggle and think that somehow there’s something wrong with them,” she says in the interview. “And I want them to know that Michelle and Barack Obama, who have a phenomenal marriage and who love each other, we work on our marriage. And we get help with our marriage when we need it.”